Asperger
July 30, 2010 by admin · Leave a Comment
My husband my have Asperger's (no eye contact, low interest in sex, meltdowns, walks on toes, fixates on subjects etc). We're working on finding a dr. to dx him as he says he'd feel better to know "why" he feels as he does.
On my end, what I can do to make this easier on him?
For example, he has problems with crowds so I plan trips on "off" days of the week. We often fight (or rather, I complain and he shuts down) about his lack of interest in sex. He states it is not a lack of interest in me–just that he feels over stimulated sometimes and sex is not a focus for him. This hurts my feelings, but if he is an Aspie, I don't want to make things more difficult on him. If he requests silence during an outburst and I don't comply, he breaks things, comes at me, or has suicidal threats. How does one achieve balance -or- approach issues like this?
Any tips are appreciated.
Answer:I have Aspergers. If he's diagnosed with it, you can support him by learning all you can about the condition and having extra patience with him in certain situations. Our social skills are delayed, so we sometimes come off as rude or insincere without having any idea that people are interpreting us that way. I'd recommend politely letting him know if he does that (without mentioning his condition) since it helps us gain social skills, but we need people to understand that we're not necessarily rude people, just developmentally disabled.
You might want to try couples counseling for your relationship issues. I wouldn't think his Aspergers (if he has it) would necessarily have to do with it, but if it does, I'm sure a counselor would know how to weigh that into the solution.
(Regarding the word "Aspie," I don't think most of us interpret it as a slur unless someone deliberately uses it condescendingly. I use it myself sometimes since it's much shorter than "Aspergers sufferer.")
Answer:Aspie?
I'm offended.
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